I Worry.

Therefore I tell you: do not worry about your life.

What you will eat, what you will drink.

Or about your body.

Or what you will wear.

Is not life more important than food?

Is not the body more important than clothes?

Look at the birds of the air;

They do not sow, or reap, or save  –

Yet your heavenly Father?

He feeds them.

Are you not much more valuable than they?

Who of you, by worrying, can add a single hour to your life?

And why do you worry about clothes?

Go look – and see how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or toil.

Yet I tell you that not even Solomon, in all of his splendor and wealth, was dressed like a flower in the field.

Not even Solomon, the man who impressed the Queen of Sheba.

If that is how God clothes the grass, which is here today, gone tomorrow,

will he not much more clothe you?

Oh you, oh you of little faith.

So do not worry, saying,

What shall I eat?

What shall I drink?

What shall I wear?

For those who do not know their Father run after all these things, and

Your heavenly Father knows that you need them.

But seek first his kingdom

his righteousness

and all these things will be given to you.

Do not worry about tomorrow,

for tomorrow will worry about itself.

Each day has enough trouble of its own.


Matthew 6:25-34

photos shared by instagram: laurennicolelove


5 Myths About Marriage: Debunked.

LAST GIVEAWAY WINNERS: Winners of the book, We Can’t Go Home Again are: @MeganDutill and Julie from San Diego. Winners of the 2 sets of prints are: @randikayanthony and @laadycakes!

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{+} The Perfect Wife Is Betty Draper. I knew this was false before I got married. I’ve known for awhile now that I am not Betty Draper, nor am I my mother – and no one expects me to be. AND YET, I’ve had to spend so much time dealing with the guilt that slaps me upside the face every time my husband cooks, does the dishes, or washes our towels for me. See that? “For me.” He does it for us. And he’s part of us. There’s no invisible list of Globally Applicable Wife Responsibilities, except for what my husband has personally asked me (and sweetly) to be responsible for. It’s taking a lot of expectation/responsible-for-everything complex undoing to see marriage as, “for us” instead of “for me” or “for him.”

{+}All My Problems Go Away. Very unfortunately, zero of my problems have gone away. Well, one did. I can now complain to a real human being instead of my pillow. It’s (not) funny how we view marriage as what simultaneously makes our life perfect and what ends our life altogether. Life just keeps on going. And I keep having days where I don’t know what I’m doing with it. But thank goodness for that, I think.

{+} Husbands Tell Women What To Do. I half believed this myth in the, “I won’t have to freak out about things anymore” kind of way because, “husbands just have ANSWERS, you know?” I also half believed it in the, “I’ve witnessed zillions of crappy marriages where women are just given instructions and since they have to submit, that’s how it all goes down” kind of way.  Both ways are totally incorrect, it turns out. My husband neither has all the answers, nor does he ever give me instructions or force me to “submit” (to what I don’t know).Except the time I really wanted to buy eyeshadow and he asked me to not buy it till next week so I had to wait. So yeah. Good men don’t tell women what to do. (And good women don’t tell men what to do. Personal reminder.)

{+} Girls Miraculously Transform Into “A WIFE.” I don’t put down my Lauren name-tag and pick up my Wife name-tag. In fact, the more I’ve tried to “be a good wife” instead of being a good version of myself, the more problems we’ve run into. Being a “good wife” projects poor expectations of a relationship status and a relationship role, but being a loving Lauren to a man I’m crazy about? Oh yes. I can do that. ALSO. “Being a wife” takes up a pretty small part of my day, and that’s not a euphemism. Most of my day is still filled with being the exact same person I was as a single person, and I’m still the only person that is 100% responsible for my present and future.

{+} Men Are Sex Addicts. Nah, sex addicts are sex addicts. Men are not sex addicts. They have feelings, thank the LORD, and it turns out I’m the one who wants to pass out after sex and he’s ready to start Day 2 in the same 24 hour period. (I find this hilarious. Just one more thing that Hollywood has gotten all wrong in their gender stereotyping.) Oh, fun fact: 30-40% of married women have higher sex drives than their man – for a season, or permanently. Sorry to keep beating a dead horse (there I go again) but I’m on a personal mission to kill this idea that men are the only creatures who desire or enjoy sex. I just want to hear massive deep sighs of relief from all the girls feeling shame regarding their sex drives, and from all my beloved girlfriends out there who can’t figure out WHAT is wrong with them when they want sex and their husbands aren’t living up to their 24/7 sex machine cultural reputation.

Anyway, now that I think about it, the majority of what the world told me about marriage is…wrong.

My husband doesn’t suck, we aren’t bored with each other yet, I don’t cringe when he grabs my butt in the kitchen, I don’t do all the cooking and cleaning, we both still have a life, I don’t feel trapped, I still have rights to my set of car keys, men haven’t stopped hitting on me in the grocery store, there are still bills to pay for which I am partially responsible, and I still am sort of flailing through my life figuring out what I’m doing.

But, all of this is kind of really nice, because I’m reminded that my relationship with Max is mine. It’s ours. And that makes it so special. It’s not the world’s. It’s not anybody else’s. It’s finally a place where I can close my door and put up my hands and say, YES!  I get to be ME with someone else who loves ME! for the first time ever.

PS. Do any other married women out there not feel married (cue angelic orchestral choir and release the doves) and more feel like….rooming with a hot guy/best friend? In the good way, I mean. Not in the bored with my roommate way.

PPS. What myths have you been de-bunking about marriage, if you’re married? And what do you believe about marriage that you think sounds depressing or terrible, if you’re single?.

Giveaway: Two Books & Two Sets of Prints!

Yes it ISSSSS. Today I’m giving away TWO signed copies of my husband’s book of short stories, We Can’t Go Home Again.

It was released at the beginning of the year for Kindle (99¢) and iTunes (99¢), but it was just released in paperback!

(If you don’t want to wait to win, you can just go order it, ’cause it’s only $5!)

I’m also giving away two sets of little beautiful prints that feature lines from his book!

TO ENTER: Leave a comment with your EMAIL ADDRESS or TWITTER HANDLE.
You get a DOUBLE ENTRY if you click “Like” on this post, too!

(I need a way to get a hold of you if you win.)

Four people will win! Two people will get a copy of the signed book, and two people will get a set of prints. ♥

Entry closes on Thursday, May 10th, at midnight PST.

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PS. I have a confession. I didn’t read short stories much before I met Max, but good lord. They really rip your heart out and put it back in again.

PPS. If you’ve already read his book and want the prints, go leave a review on Amazon, and Max will send you the prints for free!
HEAR THAT. There’s a way to guarantee getting free prints in your mailbox!


la jolla beach and point loma, in photos

On Thursday night, the beautiful Alexa Kerouac came to stay with us for a couple nights! We drove her to San Diego on Saturday morning, and Max decided it would be a perfect adventure day. I’ve never been before. We had coffee at Bird Rock, and spent the day exploring La Jolla Cove, Sunset Cliffs, and Point Loma.

The first little row of photos are from my Instagram. I wish I’d brought my camera down to the seals in La Jolla! They were adoraabblleee. The rest of the photos are taken with my camera. ♥

“my love for you is more athletic than a verb” – sylvia plath

/ / / point loma, naval base / / /