DISCLAIMER: Next month’s topic on GoodWomenProject.com is “Ask A Married Woman.” We’ve received nearly 200 questions from mostly single women, and unfortunately, only about 25 or 30 of these questions will be answered due to the time constraint. However, they’ll be answered in detail by some wildly gracious and experienced married women in a serious manner. In the meantime, I’m going to be taking some of the questions submitted, and answering them in one-liners. Take a deep sip from your coffee mug and let’s get to my rare appearance of Snark.
Question 1: The church I use to attend taught the young ladies that we shouldn’t “want” to get married and “desiring” marriage was wrong… Even sinful. Our man would be found doing ministry at our same church and serving side by side with them. They would become husband material only if approved by the pastor, otherwise they were not good enough. What would you say to this and breaking free of this mentality? What does it mean to be a spiritual leader and what SHOULD we expect from a man? How do we not set our standards too high, without having none at all?
Answer: Leave the church immediately and sign yourself up for therapy.
Question 2: How do you deal with being single before you get married?
Answer As in, “how do you deal with your disease” before you find “the cure?”
Question 3: What are your thoughts on waiting to have children the first year (or three) to bond with your new husband?
Answer: If you want kids right now, you should have them. And if you don’t, you shouldn’t. Stop letting your mother judge you.
Question 4: Was it easy for you to give up your life to get married?
Answer: If you have to give up your life, you are either doing it wrong, or you don’t know what your life is defined by.
Question 5: How forward or obvious should you be if you are interested in a guy? Should you let him know you’re interested? Or just wait until he says/does something?”
Answer: If you wait until everything in your life comes to you, you won’t have it. Be confident and go after the guy you like. Even though some people would like you to think this, being a woman doesn’t disqualify you from vocalizing what you want.